I'm quite shocked really, but here's what I have to say.

Kay, I salute you for being calm, outside at least. There will always be ups and downs, try your best to save this one. Your love is real, and if it's channeled into a black hole that is Jay's heart, it's better to save it for another who will embrace and appreciate it.

As for Jay, sometimes passion dies. It's an inevitable part of any relationship at some point, and IS NOT an indication that things should end. You'd be surprise it's just a phase. Try try and try, you'll know when it's really gone. A decision to break up today, cannot be undone tomorrow.

Take care Kay. Be strong.

K
 

To be true.. I'm cried after reading your blog.. I could understand what u feel now!

Anyway just be strong.. Try to divert your attention to other things.. Get some friends n hang out!
 

Yeah, kind of like Ken said already, passion can ebb and flow in a relationship and it doesn't necessarily mean that things are coming to an end.

I think you're right that it's something you should work through together, though. But that's just my personal viewpoint. *hugs*
 

Something similar happened to me years back and an old friend advised me to keep myself together, re-focus on yourself and don't kid yourself that things will be the same; the relationship will either be stronger or gone.Keep your chin up. Now, I am going for another smoke.

can
 

Kay, sweetie, I am sorry you are going through this. Know that you are NOT alone, there are people who care about you, I know you cannot confide in your family but there are others out here who feel for you and care for you that you can talk to.

Passion changes in a relationship. After three years you do not feel the same as when you first meet someone, whether in the bedroom or some other room. There is a feeling of excitement that comes with meeting someone new, and Jay is trying to recapture that with Jason I think. What I hope he realizes is that the excitement of meeting someone new is replaced by the day-to-day excitement of being with someone you love, which feels different but truly is so much better. Maybe what needs to happen is for you and Jay to take your relationship to a new level (by living together, maybe?) instead of just giving up.

As for this Jason...first, he is a fool, professing his "love" after two weeks of just flirting...I am sorry, that is not love, that is the excitement of meeting someone new. And second, to say he wants to meet you, well, once he knows Jay is attached if he doesn't back out of the picture, he is a bad person in my book. He wants to meet you? He is willing to break up a three-year relationship for his two weeks of lust? To hell with him.
 

Kay dear, please accept my hugs. Its a horrible thing to happen but its good to know you guys can talk it out. Whatever happens, just remember, that you must look after YOUR BEST INTEREST. Selfish as it may sound, your dignity & happiness comes first, always. If you need to talk/vent, just email me at androjane@gmail.com
 

OMG! This is so sudden.

The things that I want to say have already been said by the rest. When feelings are not as strong, it doesn't mean that the relationshop will end.

If that is the case, then Jay will never ever will find a long term boyfriend. I truly hope Jay realises that.

And it is indeed unfortunate that he should meet Jason at this time in the relationship.

For you Kay, I hope you stay strong and positive. I really hope that things will work out, after this so-called "break". Perhaps he does need to time to explore his feelings and what he wants.

All the best to the both of you *hugs*
 

This certainly hurts. Ouch. Come here for a hug. It's such a horrible thing to happen and I really hope you guys manage to work things out. Take care of yourself, K, and remembe rthat we're all here for you. Perhaps Jay just wants some time apart to work out some things in his head...

Paul
 

It struck me right from the beginning that this was supposed to be a Jay-and-Kay blog, but the only one ever blogging was you Kay.

When you blogged about the efforts you went to to hide his present, the ideas you had to make him feel really loved (something about a hot towel, etc), I couldn't help but wonder if he did the same thing for you too.

He says he loves you, but I just wonder if he has been taking you for granted all this time. I'm sure you must be a wonderful loving partner to have. You're sensitive, attentive and sweet.

But is he?

You should consider dumping him. You deserve better.
 

surfer - I have to admit that Jay is not so much of a sentimental person but I can assure you he's done so much more great things for me. He turned down an opportunity to work in Europe. He moved in closer to me so we could meet more frequent. He called me every night to say goodnight. I can say so many more so please don't say that he's worthless. Life is nothing without him. I deserve him.
 

I'd say that you are going through one of the toughest and most trying moment of your relationship.

I'm sure all your readers have their own views, but what matters most is really your own happiness.

Survive this trial, and I'm sure there's nothing else that will rock the cradle anymore.

Be strong, and let all your affairs fall into place in time.